Even though we like to pretend they don’t happen, female periods are a part of our lives. Sorry for my gentlemen readers, but it’s true. No worries, there will be some useful information in this post for you as well.
As I am writing this I realize that I am a total poster child for a woman on her period when it’s that time of the month. I crave chocolate, want to spork everyone’s eyes out, have zero patience for anything and will watch any movie with Hugh Grant in it. I want to help the woman (and men) of the world find ways to make this awful time of each month less awful. I mean, it’s not fun for anyone that feels the rage of a hormonal woman. Ever.
❤ Drink loads of water! Sometimes when we are all bloated and icky it’s due to not having enough water. Our bodies hold on to the extra water that time of the month. I don’t typically get headaches but in the event that you get them that time of the month, water should also help prevent brain pains. Get your water on, ladies.
❤ If you’re going to eat chocolate, go for raw chocolate. It is way better for you and will give you the fix that I know we all need when Aunt Flo is around. It is also shown that raw cacao helps live a longer healthier life. Who doesn’t want that?
❤ My health coach taught me about the wonders of raspberry tea. It helps balance our our hormones and also helps with those icky cramps. Have a tea party and fight away the evils of your rag.
❤ I also don’t typically breakout (I am among the lucky) but if you do, some tea tree oil on your bump, blemish rash, creature, growth, or alien that is coming out of your skin will definitely do the trick. Thank me later.
❤ Something that helps me in a lot of stressful situations in life is dancing. Dance away the pain, annoyances, and evil. The harder you shake it the better in most cases.
❤ Allow yourself to have a day or in extreme cases, two. Put on some yoga pants and a tank top and veg the hell out. No one is going to hold it against you. We all have those days and no one will blame you for taking the time out to be miserable in the comfort of your own bed.
❤ Even if you might feel dreadful, pretty yourself up. It will make you feel better. Put on something you love and a full face of makeup and go to the cinema. Maybe there is a new store you’ve been meaning to check out or a simple walk around the park. Go spread your prettiness to the masses.
❤ Look at photos of cute animals on the internet. Adorable creatures can be a great distraction and make you feel less evil.
❤ Color! Head to the store and buy a shit ton of coloring books and color away the stress.
❤ Do yoga. There are so many great stretches that can help relieve some of the tension in our sensitive parts.
❤ What I am about to say should be in your memory as strong as the first rule of fight club. NEVER, I repeat, NEVER ask a woman if she is on her period. If she is a bit moody, I would be logical and assume she is either pissed about something or she could be on her period or hormonal or something. Whatever the case may be…NEVER ask.
❤ Help your woman friend with chores or if you see she has a lot going on in her daily life. Offer to assist.
❤ Treat her like a lady and make her feel beautiful. Compliment her when you can but don’t over do it. Turn up the charm and make her feel wonderful.
❤ Build a giant ass pillow fort for her in the middle of the living room and give her a back rub.
❤ I know sometimes during that time of the month, you feel like your lady friend is about to talk in tongues, her head is about to spend backwards and she is going to puke up pea soup exorcist style but realize what she is dealing with. I completely understand you will never know what it is like to actually have your period but at least be aware of the symptoms. Just remember that everything that is going on with her is uncomfortable and unpleasant. Be on your best behavior as much as possible and you wouldn’t have to worry about calling a priest.
❤ Stop being fucking grossed out! Seriously. I will never understand men that are like “Don’t talk to me about this” or “TMI!”. If a woman is talking to you about this it is because she is close to you or wants to be close to you. You being grossed out only makes her never want to share anything with you. Stop being grossed out by the very part that you wanted to touch the day before.
❤ Comfort her. Be her hero and give her a nice massage or go out and buy her some raw chocolate. Make her as comfortable as possible.
❤ Snuggle with her in bed and read comic books.
I hope that you found this guide useful. The war with your uterus is almost over ladies and guys, hang in there.